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SECTION ONE:

Write down the number of the statement if you and the person you’re dating . . .

1.  Have fun together most of the time.
2. Each enjoy spending time separately, with your own friends, as well as with each other’s friends.
3. Always feel safe with each other.
4. Trust each other.
5. Are faithful to each other (if you have made this commitment).
6. Support each other’s individual goals in life, like ministry, education, or career goals.
7. Respect each other’s opinions, even when they are different.
8. Solve conflicts without putting each other down, cursing at each other, or making threats
9. Both accept responsibility for own actions.
10. Both apologize when wrong.
11. Both have decision-making power in the relationship.
12. Are proud to be with each other.
13. Encourage each other’s interests like sports and leisure activities.
14. Have some privacy—letters, journals, and personal phone calls are respected as one’s own.
15. Have close friends and relatives who are happy about your relationship.
16. Never feel like you’re being pressured for sex.
17. Always allow each other “space” when you need it.
18. Always treat each other with respect.

SECTION TWO:

Write down the number of the statement if one of you . . .

1. Gets extremely jealous or accuses the other of cheating or wanting to cheat.
2. Puts the other down by calling names, cursing, or making the other feel bad about him or herself.
3. Yells or speaks in harsh tones.
4. Doesn’t take the other person, or things that are important to him/her, seriously.
5. Doesn’t listen when the other talks.
6. Frequently criticizes the other’s friends or family.
7. Pressures the other for sex.
8. Has ever threatened to hurt the other or commit suicide if the other leaves.
9. Cheats or threatens to cheat.
10. Is into pornography.
11. Tells the other how to dress.
12. Is opposed to, or makes fun of, the other’s spiritual commitment or involvement with church.
13. Acts one way at church but another way outside of church.
14. Has ever grabbed, pushed, hit, or physically hurt the other.
15. Blames the other for his/her own behavior (“If you wouldn’t have made me made, I wouldn’t have . . .”)
16. Embarrasses or humiliates the other.
17. Smashes, throws, or destroys things.
18. Tries to keep the other from having commitments and ambitions, such as a job or education goals.
19. Makes all the decisions about what the two of you do.
20. Tries to make the other feel crazy or plays mind games.
21. Goes back on promises and regularly does not keep his/her word.
22. Acts controlling or possessive.
23. Uses alcohol or drugs.
24. Ignores or withholds affection as a way of punishing the other.
25. Depends completely on the other to meet social or emotional needs.
26. Demands to know where the other one is at all times.

CONCLUSION:

Lot’s of numbers from Section One and no numbers from Section Two:

It seems that your relationship has healthy qualities.  If the relationship continues for another three months, take the quiz again and see if the results have changed any.

One or more numbers from Section Two:

You need to immediately seek input from your parents or a qualified caring adult concerning your relationship.  It appears to be lacking the qualities of a healthy relationship and has the potential to be harmful to you.  Please take this warning seriously!  Unhealthy dating relationships are not something to ignore; it will only get worse with time.